Nice Batam trip but sad today

Batam trip on Sunday has been nice. I got to spent nice quality time with my 4 friends and my dear. At the trip, he really made me feel very blissful and happy. I really should appreciate and care for him more. Sometimes love is so funny, or maybe I am funny cos I am always in love those guys that treat me very badly. Time to change this fact. I do hope I can find someone that I love and really loves me a lot. I hope to be able to be his and only his, like what I felt initially in my ex-marriage and also my last relastionship.

I have some Batam pics in my face book, so friends welcome to go view. Though we did not really get to play the sea sports, it has been fun. After reaching Batam on Sunday afternoon, we rested a while and went shopping for like 3 hours. Was a bit of rush cos we went 2 malls. Came back was already late. So it was dinnertime and then mahjong. One poor friend is used to sleeping early but we were playing mahjong in his room and he was unable to sleep. Apologises to you :) 2nd day morning woke up for swimming, then breakfast then some card games, tv time, checkout then went spa. So shiok! Cheap and good. Will definately go back for more spa in future. My two best lady friends shared the spa package, me and my dear shared another one and lastly the other two guys shared one. So funny lor, but enjoyable lah. I think my dear a bit not used to massage and spa so he a bit ackward but overall I guess he enjoyed himself too. Oh ya, in total I bought two caps (one adidas and another polo ralph), one pair of shoe plus a lot of titbits. Haha... of course la. Bought for my family, Chris and also my colleagues.

Come back and two of my friends got sick. Not only that, my best best gal friend fall out with me. I did something to really hurt her this time. I am really very sorry but I guess nothing I do or say can help now. Really very upset about this lor, cos it's really my fault. Somemore at work I really very stressed. Too many work to do but no mood. So my mood these two days haven been really good. Esp today cos I thought about a lot of things and really wanted to burst out crying le. So depressed. My dear was sweet enough to come have lunch with me today before he went for work. I was of course happy la. Evening time he also spared me some time over the phone to cheer me up. Very nice guy hor.

Ok, end here le. Cannot let my parents see my sad face or they will worry. :) Smile Tweet, happy or not, each day will pass. So y not be happy.

My boyfriend

Hi everyone,

Yah this time I have good news. I have got a boyfriend. He loves me and treat me very nicely. This time I chose someone who loves me. He has really been trying hard to dote on me more and spent more time with me and I appreciate that fact. Maybe by and by he will make me love him more and more. I am very grateful that he does not mind my past. I feel that I am blissful now with his care, concern and love. I guess except from Chris, no other guys have treated me this way. Like a princess.. Hee.. But he always say he wouldn spoil me la.

I have been sick since Sunday night. Suddenly fever. Monday afternoon half day I went home. My dear initially wanted to come and have lunch with me but in the end had lunch and send me home. Yesterday went work but could not tong, so went A & E see dr then came back home. Dr say viral fever, hard to recover de. All these 3 days, my dear have been accompanying me before he go work. He works in afternoon shift so can only spare me the time before 2pm. I want to thank him, I know he is tired but he still come and buy lunch for me, plus accompany me cos I am sick. Such a sweet bf right?

I have to learn to treasure him more. Though I always say he does not seem to be the type of guy that I will love, he has touched me with his actions. I see effort, I appreciate and I accept.

It's hard to fully let go of my past. I still hurt but my dear has made life a lot easiler and happier for me. Thank you dear.

Finally, I hope Sunday will come faster cos our group of 6 is going to Batam together. Looking forward to spa and sea sports. Very long never go oversea holiday liao, though this time only 1 day still better then nothing.

Ok, end here. Thanks dear and I love you :p

无条件为你

I love this song now..

爱你等于拥有一片天空
任何风吹草动
都有你存在其中
自然而然的轻松

一路到夏天的尾声
无所谓到过于激动
我们有笑容我们曾心动
不再是无动于衷

无条件为你不顾明天的安稳
为你变坚强相信你的眼神
不敢想不敢问
有一天坏的可能

无条件为你放弃单独的旅程
为你坚强就不怕牺牲
我的灵魂如此沸腾
为我爱的人

喜欢复杂还是习惯单纯
我愿尽力完成
你在我心中几分
难以形容的责任

一路到夏天的尾声
无所谓到过于激动
我们有笑容我们曾心动
不再是无动于衷

无条件为你不顾明天的安稳
为你变坚强相信你的眼神
不敢想不敢问
有一天坏的可能

无条件为你放弃单独的旅程
为你坚强就不怕牺牲
我的灵魂如此沸腾
为我爱的人

爱一个人
付出才会完整
无条件越爱就越深
永远不分啊

无条件为你不顾明天的安稳
为你变坚强相信你的眼神
不敢想不敢问
有一天坏的可能

无条件为你放弃单独的旅程
为你坚强就不怕牺牲
我的灵魂
如此沸腾为我爱的人

Would there be another perfect?

I was discussing with my colleagues this afternoon during lunch about sticky boyfriends and husbands. All these make me think over my marriage with Chris and my relationship with my ex. I think I would want a boyfriend or husband that is neither too sticky nor too independent. I had found one but he does not belong to me now. He needs to have his own space so both of us can go out with our own friends and have our own freedom but at the same time we both want each other and will be around when the other party need each other. The more I think about this, the more certain I feel that this relationship and guy is perfect. Yes, I still am down. Who would not be if someone you are deeply in love with has found a girlfriend that he loves and would not be with you anymore.

When would I be able to find another perfect guy that I think is??

I am thinking of going for further studies. Considering between PSB and SHRI. Hopes to be able to get into Advance Dip in Human Resource. I am doing this for my future as well as hopefully to occupy myself more. Sigh.. money is the biggest problem. C how bah.

Fortune teller

I went to a fortune teller yesterday. He told me a lot of things. Most imptly is to take control of my emotions and money spenting. My time from now (28 years old) till I think about 35 (can't really recall) my luck is changing. I will become firmer and stronger from here on. I will be able to meet someone at about 31 years old.

I really hope to follow and then all the good things will happen to me. I am trying to let go of my past. I should start afresh (esp in love) like what he says.

My dad also told me almost the same things. For those that don't know my family well... my dad is a very strict buddhist. He has a mentor and is now a master. So in other words he also has some powers. He can see some things in me and he encourage me in the same way that the fortune teller said.

Everyone out there, please help me along. I want to be strong. I want a good, happy, blissful future. I don't know who will come along in my life. I don't know whether I can walk strongly or not. But all you friends out there help. I value my friends and family. You all have been my pillar of support a lot of times and I am very grateful. I want to say thank you to you all. Sometimes I may seem that I don't appreciate but indeed I do deep inside my heart. Esp to Hazel and Chris. You both is my very very best friend and I value you two a lot. :)