Downhill

All things have been going downhill. Esp my relationship with Alf. I don know what to say and I don know what to do. What can I do? Really change myself for him? I thought girls should really learn to be independent so that in future should anything happen we would still know how to take care of ourselves. Apparently Alf doesn think so. How is life going to continue? Divorce? Should I agree to it? If not what? Separate for a few years? I really don know. Nothing much on my mind now. Only hope to get out of all these. Can I start life afresh? Would I still be the same girl again? Would I lose my friends? Everything is a big big QUESTION MARK.

I just feel very very depressed now. Haven eaten breakfast nor lunch today. Don feel like eating. Haven taken medicine too. Can I just die like that? Will I suffer? What am I thinking? What do I want?