Decided to give him up

I have decided to give up Andy. Yes, I agree, maybe it's just infacuation thus my decision.. I just hope that the ubin trip will happen then I will do what I should.

Andy, please don ignore me anymore.. I have really decided.. It's over, it will be.. :)

And friends, sister and others, pls don bother me anymore.. I have really given up on him.. No more... please..

Depression

I promise myself, I will never ever drink and tell Alf and Andy anything again. Yest night commiteed the same stupid mistake and Alf have to ask Rich to go out and talk. Later, Andy also went out to find them so Andy knows too.. I xiao liao lah.. What should I do? Is it love, like or infacuation? Y can't I simply put it down? Am I too stubborn cos what I can't get I wan it. Something inside me suspects that Andy does like me, if not y the ring that I bought for him is on his hand? I am a very senstive girl, I can feel that Andy does feel something.

Sigh, I donno what to do. I think I need a counsellor. I cant find a suitable one. Now I am in the pits liao, Alf ask me to "hao zhi wei zhi", die lor.. What should I do? I need to egt this settled FAST!!!

SAD

Miserable.. these few days suck. Alf work suck, my life suck.

He found a girl that he like, a girl younger by 8 years??? Y not me, cos I am attached? I want to give up, but I can't. It is killing me. Killing me.. Pls God reverse the clock.. I hate myself for letting him know.. letting Alf know.. I HATE IT!!! Pls give me an answer, do I love him or am I just craving for attention.
I just wish all these will stop................S T O P

Y is love so hard

I thought "Loving you does not mean having you. Seeing you happy, I am contended" But how wrong I am.. Very very wrong. It hurts, it hurts when he start avoiding you, it hurts when he says he doesn love you, it hurts when dreams of him start killing you at night.

Happy I may be seems but inside I am hurting. I wish, I wish all these will end. Things will start being like in the past. I long for your care like in the past now, but what do I get??? Scared of seeing me!!!!!!!! Do you know that this sentence is going to kill me? I regret, I regret letting you know how I feel, I regret telling you what happened cos that changed my life but how, what is done cannot be undone. Sigh... Love is so hard!!

Dbl O

Very fun night last Sat.. Andy, alf, me and Richard and his gf (Rachel) went. Blur alf go order a very strong drink, I think is "151 gls". Then hor, Andy and Richard drank it and down they go... Both high dao bu yao zai high le...

Cut long story short, then Richard went dance floor and Andy ordered another 3 glasses. Oh no, cos he already down liao leh. Then Alf came and drank one glass, Rachel another. Last one shared by all 3 of them. I have to keep holding on to Andy cos he really cant make it liao.. Later Alf and another friend have to bring Richard and Andy to rest at the chill out bar.. So funny, they lie there like for 1 hour!!! Finally, Andy came my house and then Richard was send home by Rachel and friend lor.. Actually Alf and Rachel also extremely high liao but they have to make themselves sober lor..

Overall, a very very fun and memorable night.. Hehe..